You do WHAAATTT????

28 Oct

img_5128

Intimacy and anything that includes talk about the bedroom are very taboo subjects to some.  Sex is only spoken about in whispers and late night conversations for those who tend to be uncomfortable muttering those  private words. While what happens behind closed doors is private for some, for others open conversation is a helpful tool in spicing things up during private time.

Enters me,  the dirty mouthed, proud queen of the 3am nursing convos. Where most nothing is off limits and sex could be an open subject. Let’s just say all of us know each other well.  So when the opportunity to join Pure Romance came along I jumped at the chance. And of course all of my nursing pals seemed to agree that this was the perfect second job for me. What is Pure Romance and what do I do?

Enter the quietest chick in the room who scarily asks, “You do THOSE parties?” “You sell sex toys and orgasm creams?”  At first it was quite hard for me to talk about. Me…queen of 3am dirty talk, whaaaat?  All of a sudden I saw people picturing me all leather clad with spiked heals and cracking whips and floggers at parties.  Some thought orgies even happened there. What kind of chick do you all think I am?  I don’t whip anyone at “those parties”. If you need a beating,  I won’t be showing up with my whip and Come F*ck Me Pumps.  But I do giggle at the thought of it.  Holy shit when I show up fully dressed wearing my best smile…and yes I do wear heels sometimes.

Harder than overcoming that was telling my parents. First I broke the news to my sister. She not as loud about sex as I am. (That’s not what I meant, ya sicko) She’s just more reserved than I am.  And with good reason. I don’t think my parents could have handled two of me.  My sister would ask when I was going to break the news to them.  I started slowly with my mom.

Me:”Um, Mom, I started doing something for extra money.”

Mom: “Shit, Donna, you’re a stripper, aren’t you?”

Me: “Not quite…I’m always fully clothed.”

Mom: “You’re selling dildoes or something?”

Me: ” Yeah, but I can’t tell Daddy, he’ll be pissed.

Mom: “I’ll tell your father, don’t worry about it.”

So typical of my mom to not even bat an eye over it.  My dad’s reaction was quiet at first,  now he asks after every party if I actually sold the sex swing.  I find this hilarious. “Yeah, Dad…I sold the swing. It was a hit.  I’m great with the demo. (Dad cringes) Want to stop talking about it now, do ya?” Poor Dad… I’m the official reason why there were no more. That mouth of mine is always getting me in trouble.

So what are one of those parties really like?   It’s a kick ass party where ladies get together and  relax, have a glass of wine and be entertained by yours truly. I’ve heard I’m quite funny at times. It’s not all about the toys, either.   It’s about empowering each other to learn about what works and what doesn’t.  I want to empower you to know what you like and not be afraid to say it out loud. (Don’t get the air horn and announce it at the mall, announce it to your partner for cryin’ out loud!) And I want you to know there’s strength in being an awesome chick who is confident, which also creates a stronger bond between couples. But I’m going to do it in a way that’s hilarious at times, and you’re going to learn a little diddy or two as well.

I bet you’re wondering why I’m all of a sudden announcing this after over a year of parties full of lotions and potions and vibrating fun.  I simply didn’t feel like talking about the marathon for the moment.  Sex toy talk sounded more fun and sex is supposed to be fun!!!!

So I’m challenging you to hit me up and party with me. I mean it’s free for Jake’s sake.  I’ve got jokes for days… oh and my swing demo…. uhhhhh-mazing!

Until next time,

DP Babbles

http://www.pureromance.com/donnapatton

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: