Communication and such…

21 Jan

I’ve been listening, lately, to many of my friends’ stories. Stories about communication, lack thereof, way too much, the rules about communication. This is a big deal. Communication is key in everything, yet it’s something most of us do poorly.

Take me for instance. I consider myself a pretty passionate person. I feel things and when I feel strongly about anything…I cry. When I’m super angry, frustrated, happy,or sad…it’s a given. I. Just. Cry. The problem is that people who don’t know me well enough, don’t know that, so it comes off as weak.  If you’re nice to me I’m pretty open. If you raise your voice at me, I shut down.  I wear my heart on my sleeve. I’m no saint though. Sometimes I’m a downright asshole.  I usually end up apologizing for it, even when well deserved.  I listen to stories and read articles and it makes me realize how many of us are communication rejects.

I have a beautiful, smart friend who has been in the dating scene for quite a while. But she tells me stories about rules and shit. Wtf? You mean if you like someone, there are rules? You can’t just call them, or text them. And if you do, you have to wait to respond for a certain amount of time?  Whaaaaaaat?????

So we’re supposed to play games? I’m old and out of the game then. That’s plain old stupid. Does that go for everyone? Do you do that to your friends and people you are close to as well? Do I need to learn new rules of communication? If you feel the need to game play, why bother even talking to someone? If you don’t want to talk to someone, you don’t just tell them?  If you want to play games, can’t you play beer pong, Cards Against Humanity or Corn Hole?  Maybe a fun little strip Twister?

Then there’s the texting content rules. For instance using a period at the end of a sentence is considered aggressive or means you have attitude. What the f*ck was I thinking. All that time in English and I don’t need to use a period. All those years of school wasted.

Don’t text back more than someone texts you. It looks desperate. I can see not writing a book, but I’m wondering if someone gives a 5 word sentence and then you text back two sentences, are you now considered needy?  This shit is rough…

I would have some issues in today’s dating world. I have some issues in today’s everyday world. I’m a rule breaker. So, I’m glad I don’t have to do this. I don’t have these hellacious rules in my book. I talk to much, text to long, love to hear stories. I also like people to know they are thought of, and cared for. I would never want someone to feel like shit because of me. I’m sure I’m not innocent, I’m just sayin’… can’t we be nice and mostly honest? You don’t have to lay it all out there but you don’t have to be ridiculously sketch about it either.

This is what I (and some of the people I know ) wish.  I wish it for everyone. I know it’s not realistic, but let me ride on my pink unicorn for a few minutes. These are DP Babbles Rules (with friend’s additions) for being human. They aren’t even dating rules. I know nothing about that so I’m going broad with it.

Say hello to people. Look them in the eye and smile. (You’ve got an amazing smile!)

Be nice to those who care about you, but never string them along.  Be upfront…upfront. (See, friends…I do listen to these stories!)

Call. (This was a really passionate request) If you can’t call, let someone know your thinking of them.  It’s good stuff. I love random texts from my friends. I also love letting others know they crossed my mind. This is not just an opposite sex thing, this is a human thing.

Don’t yell (use ALL CAPS) in your texts. It’s annoying and not cute.

Don’t ignore people and f*ck the time rule. If you want to respond you should. And you shouldn’t have to wait 4 hours to do it.

When your wrong, say it and apologize sincerely.  Admit when you screwed up. We all do it. We should all own it. I even have issues with this one…but we are all a work in progress.

Lastly, don’t be a total douche canoe. Use the golden rule. It really does still apply. And I can tell you it applies more than the stupid texting rules. No one likes crappy people who play games and make others feel like shit.  No one wants to feel inferior to someone else. So don’t try hard to destroy someone. Again…not a dating rule…a human rule.

If I want to add in my own  ridiculous rules though… Don’t use the word “gotcha” or the letter “K” when responding to me. It agitates me. I don’t know why, but it’s my own ridiculous rule.

Until next time…DP Babbles

 

 

 

 

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2 Responses to “Communication and such…”

  1. Marianne January 22, 2016 at 2:19 am #

    Im too old to know all these rules, but since most of my friends are within a few years of me either way, they probably dont know them either! The rules about waiting and texting too much are stupid. If you’re trying to follow rules, you’re not being yourself anyway! And my texts will always have periods at the end of sentences. Please know I am being neither rude nor aggressive….I just have a rule about run-on sentences!

    Like

  2. Kelli Matonak January 23, 2016 at 7:05 pm #

    Gotcha. Pretty sure I use that a lot! Lol another fun read DP 😘

    Like

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